Marriage is an institution, a job and a project all in one. When you agree to get married, you have agreed to stay committed to one person for the rest of your life. Marriages break up when commitment stops applying and there are a lot of reasons why people feel that they cannot stay married again. If you want a marriage that will last for life, or are wondering how to fix your already troubled marriage, these ten secrets of a successful marriage will go a long way to help.
1. Stay Independent: Marriage should not rob you of your personality or individuality. You will always be a person with unique abilities, whether you are married or not. When you lose yourself because you are married, it will only be a matter of time before your partner starts seeing you as a burden. Learn to exist and take personal decisions on your own, even if you still want your spouse’s opinion.
2. Know your spouse’s love language: There are five love languages. Many married couples do not know this, not to talk about which one applies to their spouse. Does your partner love words of affirmation or physical touch? Does your wife love gifts or acts of service? Find out and act on their love languages, and watch your marriage thrive.
3. Communication is a must: Without communication, relationships die off. This includes marriage. The fact that you live with someone does not mean you should not make out time to talk and find out if they are okay, how it is going at work, if anything is bothering them, and so on.
4. Do not take your spouse for granted: As is with human nature, when you get so used to someone, you feel so comfortable around them and let go of certain things. While that is good to an extent, it becomes a problem when you start taking your partner for granted because you are so used to them. So, do not let go of the things they hold dear because you are now married to them.
5. Compliment them: Even if it means doing so every day, let your partner know that they are doing well. Do not be quick to only criticize. Even as you let them know when they mess up, make it a point of duty to always remind them of their positive sides as well.
6. Be romantic: The little things matter. Get them flowers or chocolate on your way back from work. Watch the sun together as it goes down. Play fun games together. Tease each other in healthy ways. Try out new recipes together, even if they fail the first time. Always make time in your day to do things as a couple.
7. Do not threaten your spouse: It is easy to let anger get they better part of you. This why you must show restraint even when angry. Threatening to leave your partner or get a divorce when you both fight, is a no-no. Not only does this weaken trust, if you keep talking about something, it will most likely happen. So, unless you are tired of staying married, settle your fights like adults.
8. Have date nights: Many couples who have been married for a while overlook date nights. Dates strengthen bonds of relationships. Make a habit of fixing dates and going out with your partner. Put of your devices and enjoy each other’s company. Relieve memories and watch the sparkle come back to your marriage.
9. Let go of grudges: When you have a disagreement or fight with your spouse, let it go after resolving it. Do not hold unto past wrongs in order to score cheap points with them in the future as you will only end up causing resentment to build up.
10. Do not let issues fester: When an issue comes up, deal with it head on. Allowing fights to fester can blow them out of proportion and this can lead to bigger, avoidable issues. Many successfully married people say that they do not go to bed angry. Adopt this habit if you can, and see positive changes in your marriage.